Monday, June 1, 2009

I. Guess it's. Time. For you. To hate Me again.

Time for a bit of the old "Ultra-Violence." Who is gonna rape every one of the Pussycat Dolls? Slim Shady. Who tells fun stories about being molested by his step-dad? Slim Shady. Who dumped Christopher Reeve into quicksand? Slim Shady. Who killed Lindsay Lohan? Don't watch her shitty movie to find out, just buy Relapse and you will find out when, where, and how Slim Shady did it. Or was it Eminem? Or was it Marshall Mathers? Damn this boy can push the envelope. The lines between the multiple personalities created by Em have officially disappeared. Let me just say I have been agonizing about this post. Benny suggested I speak my mind and I agreed to do so, but now the task feels a bit daunting. In the Bible of Hip Hop, The Book of Dre and The Book of Eminem would be my favorite chapters right now (sorry Kanye, in the BrainSlice version you are still just a footnote). "Marshall, sounds like an SOS" . . . . For a while there I thought they "both got weird, grew beards, and disappeared into the mountains," but Em and Dre are back with a vengeance, and it is nice to hear from them. The thing is . . . . . after starting this post I found myself going back to listening to The Eminem Show, The Slim Shady LP, and The Marshall Mathers LP. I am just not feeling the same energy that I loved in this new album. Ok here goes . . . deep breath . . . a few of my boys used to be big Nine Inch Nails fans - then Trent Reznor quit drugs. They no longer like NIN. I can't believe I am saying this, but did Em lose his edge when he quit drugs and alcohol? I am sitting here buzzed on Jameson as I write this. He no longer sounds HUNGRY. He doesn't even sound as ANGRY as he used to. His lyrics are still FUCKING INSANE. . . I even heard him mention Hannah Montana, and describe felching in detail, but something is different. I think I miss his real voice. Right now I am hearing this accent that he is using throughout almost the entire album. It is not his real voice! Fuck man that's it. My favorite song on Relapse has to be Medicine Ball. Em's lyrics always kill me, and the Christopher Reeve voice - too soon? Hahaha! Come on though, stop singing and acting and SPIT those lyrics! I love Dr. Dre. I love Eminem. This album has grown on me a bit, but I am already eagerly anticipating the next one . . . .

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